Texas: Telling fish tales equals jail time

Texas legislators, who, like all politicians, despise fibbing, are coming down on a weighty issue: cheating in bass-fishing contests.

Telling tall tales may be a matter of pride in Texas. But it may soon be against state law to tell one about a fish. A bill that would make it a misdemeanor — and in some cases a felony — to misrepresent the size, weight or provenance of a fish in a fishing tournament arrived on Gov. Rick Perry’s desk on Wednesday, after passing the State Senate in a unanimous vote on Monday.

Lying about a fish could draw a serious sentence under the new law: two to ten years in prison, plus a fine of $10,000.

Less enlightened minds would probably say that it’s up to organizers and judges to enforce the rules of what are after all private (non-governmental) affairs — no special law needed. Tournament officials could simply disqualify a cheater, for instance, and perhaps kick him out for life if his fish tales were egregious enough.

But here at Nobody’s Business, we’re just glad — glad that the Lone Star State’s problems are so slight that dozens of elected officials were able to give fish-cheating their full legislative attention.

BONUS LINK: Meanwhile, children across Texas are waiting with bated breath for another pulse-quickening Senate accomplishment: kids’ trading cards of the 82nd Legislature.

About Rogier:
Rogier is a Dutch-born, New-England-dwelling multi-media maven (OK, a writer and photographer) whose dead-tree publishing credits include the New York Times, Wired, Rolling Stone, Playboy, and Reason.
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One Comment

  1. bobl
    Posted May 12, 2011 at 8:37 pm | Permalink

    You know, Rog, Texans are extremely sensitive about size since that Alaska thing.